There’s nothing worse than a rich person who’s chronically angry or
unhappy. There’s really no excuse for it, yet I see this phenomenon
every day. It results from an extremely unbalanced life, one with too
much expectation and not enough appreciation for what’s there.
Without
gratitude and appreciation for what you already have, you’ll never know
true fulfillment. But how do you cultivate balance in life? What’s the
point of achievement if your life has no balance?
For nearly four
decades, I’ve had the privilege of coaching people from every walk of
life, including some of the most powerful men and women on the planet.
I’ve worked with presidents of the United States as well as owners of
small businesses.
Across the board, I’ve found that virtually every moment people make three key decisions that dictate the quality of their lives.
If
you make these decisions unconsciously, you'll end up like majority of
people who tend to be out of shape physically, exhausted emotionally and
often financially stressed. But if you make these decisions
consciously, you can literally change the course of your life today. Related: Tony Robbins on the Importance of Being Fearless
Decision 1: Carefully choose what to focus on.
At
every moment, millions of things compete for your attention. You can
focus on things that are happening right here and now or on what you
want to create in the future. Or you can focus on the past.
Where focus goes, energy flows.What you focus on and your pattern for doing so shapes your entire life.
Which area do you tend to focus on more: what you have or what’s missing from your life?
I’m
sure you think about both sides of this coin. But if you examine your
habitual thoughts, what do you tend to spend most of your time dwelling
on?
Rather than focusing on what you don’t have and begrudging
those who are better off than you financially, perhaps you should
acknowledge that you have much to be grateful for and some of it has
nothing to do with money. You can be grateful for your health, family,
friends, opportunities and mind.
Developing a habit of
appreciating what you have can create a new level of emotional
well-being and wealth. But the real question is, do you take time to
deeply feel grateful with your mind, body, heart and soul? That’s where
the joy, happiness and fulfillment can be found.
Consider a
second pattern of focus that affects the quality of your life: Do
you tend to focus more on what you can control or what you can’t?
If
you focus on what you can’t control, you’ll have more stress in life.
You can influence many aspects of your life but you usually can’t
control them.
When you adopt this pattern of focus, your brain has to make another decision: Related: Tony Robbins on the 7 'Forces' of Business Mastery
Decision 2: Figure out, What does this all mean?
Ultimately,
how you feel about your life has nothing to do with the events in it or
with your financial condition or what has (or hasn't) happened to you.
The quality of your life is controlled by the meaning you give these
things.
Most of the time you may be unaware of the effect of your unconscious mind in assigning meaning to life’s events.
When
something happens that disrupts your life (a car accident, a health
issue, a job loss), do you tend to think that this is the end or the
beginning?
If someone confronts you, is that person insulting you, coaching you or truly caring for you?
Does
a devastating problem mean that God is punishing you or challenging
you? Or is it possible that this problem is a gift from God?
Your
life takes on whatever meaning you give it. With each meaning comes
a unique feeling or emotion and the quality of your life involves where
you live emotionally.
I always ask during my seminars, “How many
of you know someone who is on antidepressants and still depressed?”
Typically 85 percent to 90 percent of those assembled raise their hands.
How
is this possible? The drugs should make people feel better. It's true
that antidepressants do come with labels warning that suicidal thoughts
are a possible side effect.
But no matter how much a person drugs
himself, if he constantly focuses on what he can’t control in life and
what’s missing, he won't find it hard to despair. If he adds to that a
meaning like “life is not worth living,” that's an emotional cocktail
that no antidepressant can consistently overcome.
Yet if that
same person can arrive at a new meaning, a reason to live or a belief
that all this was meant to be, then he will be stronger than anything
that ever happened to him.
When people shift their habitual focus
and meanings, there’s no limit on what life can become. A change of
focus and a shift in meaning can literally alter someone's biochemistry
in minutes.
So take control and always remember: Meaning equals emotion and emotion equals life. Choose consciously and wisely. Find an empowering meaning in any event, and wealth in its deepest sense will be yours today.
Once you create a meaning in your mind, it creates an emotion, and that emotion leads to a state for making your third decision:
Decision 3: What will you do?
The
actions you take are powerfully shaped by the emotional state you're
in. If you're angry, you're going to behave quite differently than if
you're feeling playful or outrageous.
If you want to shape your
actions, the fastest way is to change what you focus on and shift the
meaning to be something more empowering.
Two people who are angry will behave differently. Some pull back. Others push through.
Some
individuals express anger quietly. Others do so loudly or violently.
Yet others suppress it only to look for a passive-aggressive opportunity
to regain the upper hand or even exact revenge.
Where do these patterns come from? People tend to model their behavior on those they respect, enjoy and love.
The people who frustrated or angered you? You often reject their approaches.
Yet
far too often you may find yourself falling back into patterns
you witnessed over and over again in your youth and were displeased by.
It’s
very useful for you to become aware of your patterns when you are
frustrated, angry or sad or feel lonely. You can’t change your patterns
if you’re not aware of them.
Now that you’re aware of the power of
these three decisions, start looking for role models who are
experiencing what you want out of life. I promise you that those who
have passionate relationships have a totally different focus and arrive
at totally different meanings for the challenges in relationships than
people who are constantly bickering or fighting.
It’s not rocket
science. If you become aware of the differences in how people approach
these three decisions, you’ll have a pathway to help you create a
permanent positive change in any area of life.
This piece was adapted from Tony Robbins' new book, Money Master the Game: 7 Simple Steps to Financial Freedom. Related: Inspiring TED Talks Every Entrepreneur Should Watch
The multimillionaire self-help guru gives investing advice in his new
book, but anyone who listened to him in 2010 would be hurting
financially now
Tony Robbins in 2010, the year he recommended that everyone sell their
stocks. Four years later, the Dow Jones Industrial Average has hit new
highs. Photograph: Frederick M. Brown/Getty Images
I’m sure if I met Tony Robbins, I would find him charismatic and even charming.
I’m fairly confident he could teach even me – relentless curmudgeon and skeptic that I am – to reach for success, to awaken my inner giant.
But to become a millionaire by following his investment tips?
Cue the sound of screeching brakes.
Robbins – in case you have somehow never turned on a TV set in the
last few decades and found yourself in front of one of his infomercials,
never walked into a bookstore and found yourself staring at an entire
bookcase devoted to his self-help tomes – is a life coach. But this
being the United States, that description dramatically understates his
role in American society and his impact on our psyche. After all, this
is the guy who persuaded Oprah Winfrey to walk across burning coals. He has counseled former president Bill Clinton,
in and out of office. He coaxes “peak performance” out of sales
executives for people like Marc Benioff, founder of Salesforce.com.
All of which is great. But being good at counseling and pep talks doesn’t qualify Robbins to provide financial advice.
Yet that’s Robbins’ new gig. He’s everywhere, it seems, promoting a new book: “MONEY: Master the Game.”
True, all the yelling (“I own you!”), chanting, inspirational words
and a little bit of firewalking on the side has made Robbins himself a
millionaire. But that’s becoming a millionaire by doing what you’re good
at doing – in his case, being a life coach and convincing other folks
to pay him to inspire them. Being good at your job is a good way to make
money. It’s how Bill Gates got rich, by building the software programs
that became Microsoft, or Howard Schultz transformed a coffee shop into
the global retailing phenomenon that is Starbucks.
It’s a common American superstition that those who have earned wealth
are qualified to provide advice to others on managing it. That’s what
has encouraged Robbins, whose confidence may be as outsize as his 6’7’’
frame.
Except that it doesn’t. As professional money manager Barry Ritholtz points out in a rather scathing review, when Robbins has tried in the past to give his followers specific market advice, he’s been wrong.
In 2010, Robbins suggested his followers pull money out of stocks: to
the extent they followed his advice, they gave up 90% gains in the next
four years.
Robbins’s new book doesn’t seem to provide much in the way of trading
tips. Instead, he is offering the reader a mixture of market insights
and thoughts from such investment industry luminaries as Vanguard’s Jack
Bogle, Warren Buffett, famed hedge fund manager Paul Tudor Jones (when
the latter lost his trading “mojo”, Robbins apparently helped him track it down) and activist investor Carl Icahn.
That kind of advice is always going to be interesting to folks who
pick up Barron’s and other publications to read what the big names in
finance are doing with their money.
But here’s the rub: what guys like Paul Tudor Jones and Carl Icahn are doing with their money probably isn’t what you should be doing with yours.
They have billions and have access to a vastly different array of
investments. They can afford to take far more risk, too. It’s like
watching a stunt driver in one of those car ads: you watch with
fascination, but woe betide you if you fail to heed the writing
underneath, “professional driver on a closed course.” You can’t do the
same tricks in your Volkswagen on the highway.
There’s also some hype. Robbins coaxes a model portfolio out of Ray Dalio,
the billionaire founder of Bridgewater Associates and one of the
world’s largest hedge fund investors, describing it as a “never-before
revealed strategy”. Well, it actually has been fairly openly discussed
before and, as those familiar with what Dalio and Bridgewater are doing
have noted, Robbins’s depiction of it doesn’t accurately characterize
the way Dalio’s portfolio really works.
Warren Buffett, the chairman of
Berkshire Hathaway, became a billionaire by investing wisely. Yet what
works for billionaires rarely works for the middle class, since richer
investors can afford to take more risks.Photograph: Nati Harnik/AP
The Dalio portfolio, as described by Robbins, recommends putting 55%
of assets in bonds and another 15% in commodities. Commodities are an
exceptionally volatile asset class that many veteran financial advisors
are wary of recommending. Even their most risk-tolerant clients keep
commodities to well below 10% of their portfolios.
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But
what scares me witless is the idea that a bunch of the folks who are
lining up to buy Robbins’s book – it’s Amazon’s No 1 new release in the
“Self Help” category – will try this portfolio at home for themselves.
And that might be a recipe for real trouble.
Here’s why. Like it or not, we’re now at the tail end of a 30-plus
year bond bull market. The Federal Reserve’s next step will be – at some
stage – to begin raising interest rates. When that happens, bond prices
are going to fall. It’s mathematics.
It’s already happening, to some extent. Treasury securities were the worst performing asset class in October: a harbinger of sorts.
It’s lovely that this portfolio worked well in the past. But as the
wording attached to every mutual fund that we buy says, past performance
is no guarantee of future returns.
None of this suggests Robbins has nothing useful to say. His book takes aim at the too-aggressive marketing claims and high fees
associated with too many actively-managed mutual funds, few of which
manage to beat the market consistently. Hurrah for that. He says target-date funds are no panacea. Bravo! You shouldn’t automatically dismiss annuities as an invention of the devil: that’s another tip worth heeding.
So, too, is Robbins’ suggestion to automatically question the
credentials of anyone who tries to give you financial advice. He just
doesn’t mention that one of them may be named Tony Robbins.
Last week, I was talking to Joe Polish,
Founder of Piranha Marketing and the Genius Network, catching up on
recent happenings and discussing his latest efforts, helping Tony
Robbins promote his latest book, MONEY: Master The Game, 7 Simple Steps To Financial Freedom.
Joe,
along with his podcasting partner-in-crime, marketing guru Dean
Jackson, brought together the legendary Tony Robbins, as well as thought
leadership Robin Sharma, JJ Virgin and Mike Koenigs, for an incredibly insightful conference call on the I Love Marketing Podcast.
After
listening to the interview, I wanted to share with you some of my
biggest takeaways from the conversation because when Tony Robbins shares
his 7 simple steps to financial freedom you should listen!
Here's my 3 top, curated takeaways for all of you! 1. Become More Valuable in Order to Make More Money (and Here's How!)
The first question in the interview came from Robin Sharma,
the world famous leadership development effort and bestselling author
of many, many books on the subject. He recalls the story of Jim Rohn's
advice to a young Tony Robbins, where Jim Rohn said to a seminar group
that Robbins was a part of, "All you have to do to earn more money in the same amount of time is to become more valuable to the marketplace."
This
has obviously struck a chord with Tony, and the philosophy is the basis
of many of his companies, coachings and this new book, so Robin asked
Tony, "For anyone who wants to be more valuable, is the strategy to
develop ourselves...or is it to focus on generating more value through
our work."
Tony's response (summarized)...The most important thing
you can do is to constantly grow personally. Spend every day working on
yourself because (as Warren Buffett would agree) there is no greater
investment you can make than in yourself. When you do that, you will
become more valuable to the marketplace, and have the ability to make
more money.
After a system for self-improvement is in place, you
need vehicles for sharing that new value with others through your work.
The best vehicles are becoming a business owner, and also becoming an
"owner" of your own personal investments. The first is riskier, so the
second is crucial for longer term strategic safety. With these vehicles,
you can take your increasing value and share it with others
exponentially. 2. Health IS Wealth (and What You Need to Find Breakthroughs In Your Life)
Up next to question the "money master" was JJ Virgin.
JJ is also world-renowned as a celebrity nutritionist and fitness
expert, and she asked Tony for the three things we need to look for in
order to make breakthroughs in our lives in our finances, health and
lives.
In response, Tony recalled a memory where he encountered a
Canadian billionaire who was close to 400 pounds in weight. While
others whispered, "He's so rich! He's so rich! He's a billionaire," Tony
brought the experience back to earth by noting that, without your
health, you are certainly not rich.
More importantly, there are multiple types of wealth and different definitions of success (as I've previously discussed myself on Addicted2Success.com).
And, in order to continue building your success, you need to find the
breakthrough moments in life that allow you to finally lose weight, look
for a new job, make the extra sales calls, etc.
What you need:
strategies, stories and state. Strategies will give you the systems that
help you build habits for success, stories will give you the
motivation, removal of excuses and mindset re-framing that is necessary
to achieve those breakthrough moments necessary to have peak performance
in business, health, and life and state will give you the positive
mental attitude needed to execute properly in improving the first two. 3. Investing Comes Down to One Thing...Proper Asset Allocation
"What's your investment advice for a small business owner" asks Mike Koenigs, #1 bestselling author and serial entrepreneur.
While no one is the same, Tony suggests, every entrepreneur needs to create a brand new company right away.
He calls this new business your "money machine", and this new business has no employees or public-facing front.
Tony
strongly advises every entrepreneur set up a second area of asset
allocation that takes a percentage of your company's profits and/or your
salary and puts it in investments that will make money work for you and
compound over time. If you don't automate this process, your growing
business will suck up extra profits, or your growing lifestyle will suck
up new salary bonuses, and while you may be in good shape (or in the
favorited growth shape at times), when sh*t finally hits the fan with
your job, company, or outwardly investments, you will still be in good
shape financially as an individual because you've taken the necessary
precautions to create a "money machine" that is created of super low
risk investments based on your personal risk tolerance, age and earning
power. In Summary
Check out Tony Robbins' new book, MONEY: Master The Game, 7 Simple Steps To Financial Freedom
to find out how some of the world's most financially successful people
have mastered the money game so you can apply those same rules to your
own financial situations, and check out the rest of the stacked podcast
conversation that I have attempted to distill into three major takeaways
for you. All proceeds of his book go towards feeding over 50 million
people in need this year. Then, check out the advice on The Huffington
Post "Smarter Ideas"
section to begin finding the motivation and tactics you need to improve
your strategies, stories and states as you climb your way to financial
freedom.
- - - Jared Kleinert is a forthcoming author
and entrepreneur who has been featured in Forbes, Fast Company,
TechCrunch, Huffington Post and at TEDxYouth Miami. He is currently the
co-founder/co-author of 2 Billion Under 20 as well as the Chief Test Subject of The Gap Year Experiment. Say hi at jared@2billionunder20.com
